Sunday, October 25, 2009

Non-hijabis have more fun?

October 25th, 2009

To get straight to the point, let me ask a question.
Do muslimahs who do not wear the hijab or non-muslims, have more fun?

First of all, what
is your definition of fun?

I just want to address the common misconception that

a) not wearing hijab automatically equates you to not following the five pillars

b) by not wearing hijab you can do
anything that was and still is haram (i.e clubbing, having a boyfriend, e.t.c)

c) That you're much more stylish and beautiful without your hijab

This all just came up during an incident last week, and I was pretty shocked that even Muslims would think that just because one wears hijab, that automatically decreases the amount of fun she'll have in life.

But that doesn't mean that she's the perfect muslimah if she is wearing hijab.

Hijab doesn't stop anyone from doing 'bad' things. It's a constant reminder of your faith and what you should and shouldn't be doing.

Clubbing is one of them (has anyone seriously wanted to go clubbing ? I mean, the idea of gyrating against sweaty bodies in rhythm to a deafening beat is ... ew)

Besides the accepted notion that you shouldn't be doing anything bad at all whether you're a hijabi or non-hijabi, male or female, I think it's horrible that non-hijabis get a bad rap.

I mean, sure they're not easily identifiable as a muslim, but does that mean they should have pride in being able to 'get away' with morally-questionable circumstances?

Is it fair that many assume all non-hijabis do not pray or fast or have a general disregard for their religion?

Or that, when a hijabi decides to not wear hijab anymore, it's because she decided she wasn't having much 'fun' being a hijabi.

That wearing the hijab took away a lot of 'freedoms' from her.

Again, what is your definition of 'fun' and what is it that
I'm missing out on whenever I put on my hijab in the morning?

Do you think non-hijabis have more fun?

13 comments:

NtN said...

Salaam alykom,
I think that non-hijabis tend to feel the pressure more. Hijab is a struggle like anything else in life; it's easy for some and incredibly difficult for others. There's a difference between allowed fun and haraam fun; having known both, sitting with my sisters and having dinner and laughing is much better than clubbing, but it takes some of us more time to figure that out than others.

Btw, your blog makes me hungry every time I visit :)

Anonymous said...

i experienced both haram and halal fun. and i love halal fun so much more. siitting with sisters, chatting thats great. whenever you come out of th club, you feel some emptiness i cannot explain it. totally different from halal fun. i cannot respond to your question. because saying they have more fun than us, would let me say than non hijabis are not religious. which i dont think so.

Hijabis On Ranting Tour. said...

You iz my favouritez! Me loveszx you!

LOL :D WAy to go sista!

A'qilah

SOcalprincess said...

Well hijab is a "sticky" issue especially for teenagers growing up in western society. Wearing hijab immediately identifies you as a muslim which has some stigma to it that alot of non hijabis are worried to be associated with. If you dont wear hijab you go "under the radar" so to speak.

As for the whole fun thing, I think it depends on the person's idea of fun. Some muslimahs prefer dancing and big crowds while others prefer a night at the masjid reading quran. I think the difficult part is finding a halal medium for the extremes of western society that are seen as fun.

Ghost Writer said...

You're right, it depends on the definition of fun. When I wasn't a hijabi, I did things hijabis wouldn't do. I went to clubs, bars, concerts and messed around with guys. At that time, that was what was fun for me. When I started wearing hijab, I stopped the clubs, bars and guys (still occasionally go to concerts) out of respect for hijab and because my perspective on life has changed.

Shukran UmmIsmail Webb, May Allaah azz wal Jaal Reward you. Ameen said...

Is it fair that many assume all non-hijabis do not pray or fast or have a general disregard for their religion?
As salaamou alikum very interesting post. this Question stood out. Masha allah many non Hijabis Pray and do there duites to Allah Except they Lack in one The command on wearing Hijab. This does not make them Bad but makes them disobedient or lack the understanding of the Conditions of hijab as well hijabis they can also Lack in this. And true some Muslimahs even if they cover or a sad Case but at least they cover Sa7!1 rather you obey the command or not If Allah covers ones sin Who are we to Expose it. So some want mention they Muslim because they are shame and they should be because if a women covers and do Evil deeds in Public she should run and hide her self and be in shame. you only brought this upon your self. If you don't want to be looked down on or judge by Quraan and sunnah in a tactful manner of course then do what is Correct concerning your Deen. if not hide yr deeds and don't expose them. Some Hijabis and Niqabis are not Tactful in the speech not understand This person may she Ignorant in there deen or Really misinformed concerning the matter of Covering. But We have a responsibility to give Advice and give uon Quran and sunnah and not be nasty towards the hijabis who lack the knowledge in the conditions of hijab or the ones who don't wear at all. May we all be guided upon the right path concerning this Deen .insha allah Amin

As far as fun it's over Rated fun for the Kaafr is doing anything you please ad how you please. this is not the Way of a true Muslim and nor our attitude. but Muslim do what is Permissible and try our best to have fun with what is Halal. Because we must remember If we wish to please the people,Allah will let us with the PEople. and what Kinda fun you have when you displease you Lord and Can enter the hell fire,is impermissible fun Worth all that? and one Thing i say to my self that reminds me of adhereing to the Command to cover.
Besides Fearing Allaah is If you Can't pray in it then you shouldn't wear it out side!! IN Prayer you covered and in front of your Lord in prayer you have full respect so how is it you Strip your self of the covering between you and your Lord? is it so Easy to Face, not your creator but his creations for whom will not Benefit you on the Day of Judgement.
Correct Hijab is honor and it Shows you adhere to The Sunnah,I mean correct hijab this is Respect. Even those who Adab lack this when u a women covered does not make you righteous but it does Show yr pride as a Mumin. just my opinion Whats o the outside cover also cover the inside so we can be Complete in the way of this Deen.i Speak to my self first before any of you.

Ummismail

Shukran UmmIsmail Webb, May Allaah azz wal Jaal Reward you. Ameen said...

Also when We pray it protects us When we adhere to the times of Prayer. just like we cover it protects from setting a bad example or it should. because We should be willing to have are guard up when cover it might be just clothes to some but with these clothes it shows are shyness and Respect not to be a fitnah. I know this is not simple for some because one foot in the dunya and one foot in islam will make like hard. We should Hate what Allah hates and love what Allah loves. This what Taqwa is and if We Lack in it We do anything and everything Rather covered or not If a women is covered she knows her place and it is a reminder for her ALhamdoulilah Rabil alameen. things are hidden under the Veil is not such a bad thing but what is evil under there May she seek Refuge in Allah and May he give her guidance amin

ModestJustice said...

Thank you guys so much for answering!

It's going to take some time for me to change my own westernized concept of 'fun' although I do enjoy halal fun (not that I go out and do haram things) but SOcal Princess I agree it is pretty hard to find a middle ground.

Noor- I'm glad my diet-breaking background is working! :D

A'qilah- Love you too dear!

Ghostwriter- A lot of the hijabis I know have never experienced any of that, so we wrongly assume that it's the epitome of fun and living. By the way, can I let you know how incredibly amazing your book is?

Umm Ismail- Thank you so much for your response! I definitely agree with much of what you've written! But I think, for the hijabis who are forced, they may not be so proud and in retaliation, disregard many rules for proper hijab. But then again there are many types of hijabis and muslimahs out there; again, love your comment :]

Anon: Sorry for responding last,but thank you for responding! :D

Ghost Writer said...

Well, I do have hijabi friends who ditched the hijab for a couple of nights of clubbing cos they were craving it so much. Some of them became regular clubbers until the hijab ceased being a cultural obligation and they actually believed in it. Some just needed to get the desire out of their system and realised clubbing wasn't all that.

Glad you're enjoying my novel :) Please do spread the word and join the facebook fan page for regular news and updates! xx

sultana said...

I am hijabi and have fun. It is difficult to define but I do what I like, but I do not hang with boys and kiss them while wearing hijab.

Muslim Girl said...

I don't think that question can even be answered properly because I feel like what a person finds "fun" changes from time to time.. what we may have found fun years ago is probably different from what we find fun today.

So what a non-hijabi may find fun (whether it's halal or not) can be different from what a hijabi finds fun.

I know when I was a non-hijabi the stuff I found fun was not exactly halal, and now that I am one I have just naturally grown out of it :)

sultana said...

Where are u Modest???

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add that although it's good to discuss halaal and harram fun, that we shouldn't be forgetting the reason why we would do this in the first place.

In other words, Paradise and Hell. Yes, the choice is ever lasting bliss and enjoyment or punishment (time of punishment dependant on whether faith exists or not)

So, yes it's possible that some fun activities may have to be left due to wearing the hijaab. But we need to remember that Allah's reward is far greater than anything we imagine. And the same for the punishment.

There's a hadith to the effect of: "A place in paradise equal to the size of a lash is better than the whole world and whatever is in it"

So, if we're nearly dead (40-100 years max), then there doesn't seem any point in giving up eternity for it, right?

So, here's a reminder to my sisters, please go for eternity, and remember paradise has different levels, so go for the best one. And, in fearing Allah, he will give us far more contentment in our hearts, such that we wont need superficial 'fixes' to make us (pretend to be) happpy. And just ponder over why so many 'rich' (monetarily) people commit suicide after having (supposed) fun.

Hope we all get to paradise, ameen.

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